Saturday, 14 December 2013

Things I almost blogged about since the last time I blogged

Yeah, that's right, things I almost said but didn't....
  1. Sometimes when I am doing yoga stretches in the living room floor I think Izzie is trying to do them with me. Then I realize the ungrateful mutt just wants me to scratch her belly.
  2. I kept finding scratches on my legs and couldn’t think of how in the world they got there. Then I was like, oh yeah, I have a cat.
  3. My world is really small right now. Most of the time that’s perfect for me….sometimes it pisses me off and I feel like I’ve somehow lost value in my friendships because I stay home now.
  4. I love my children. I do not like being cooped up with them in an ice storm and no way out.
  5. When animals have gas it’s far worse than anything that could come out of a human butt. If you don’t believe me, I will loan you Sky or Ninja for 24 hours.
  6. I am not from the UK…sometimes I wish I were though. Then I could say things like “arse” and “bloody” and “bangers and mash” without sounding stupid. Or, maybe I could just call someone a wanker. That would be immensely satisfying.
  7. I’m a really good cook. However, other than cornbread, pecan pie with maple whiskey cream sauce, and gumbo, I cannot duplicate anything I make to the exact specifications of the previous time I made it. However, it is always really, really good.
  8. I created a twitter account thinking I would figure out what’s so great about it. I’ll let you know when I find the answer…
  9. The cute little beagle mix from down the street is named Patches. She has figured out that if she comes and scratches at my door I will let Sky out to play with her. She’s also figured out that if it’s raining I will feel sorry for her, and let her in, and dry her off, and give her a place to warm up a bit, and probably a dog treat….. I’m kind of a sucker like that. Just ask the cat.
  10. I still play the sims. Sometimes, if you irritate me, I will make a sim that looks just like you and let it get struck by lightning… repeatedly. Really…
  11. I have a list of things I’d love to tell women in their twenties about men and relationships. However, it wouldn’t do any good, so I won’t.  Just know I think you’re all stupid about the whole bloody thing.
  12. Sometimes standing up for what you think is right means standing alone. I’m ok with that.
  13. I have not smoked more than 1 or 2 cigarettes a day for weeks. I’ll let you know when I figure out what’s holding me back from dropping those 1 or 2. Probably pure stubbornness though. I can be kinda twisted like that.
  14. I’m kinda tickled that I used “bloody” in #11 and it didn’t sound stupid. I even did a little happy dance and said, “Woot!”
  15. And the best for last….I did not take my Christmas tree down last year. Yes, you read that right. It’s been up all year. Initially, this was because my husband had rearranged the storage room and, like a goofball, he put the Christmas boxes in the back of the room where no one could get to them. By the time he got in there and arranged the room again it was spring, and the tree is pretty, and why bother taking it down just to put it back up in a couple of months? We’ve even been putting gifts for J under the tree all year. Way to torture a 12 yr old, huh?

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